Part 1
My name is Layora and this is my
home, rather, it used to be. Now all that remains are empty houses and
scattered belongings littered upon the ground. No one lives here anymore and I
seem to be the town’s only
visitor. For reasons I don’t quite
understand, I keep finding myself coming back. But there is nothing left here,
so why do I keep coming back? I don’t quite understand, have I lost
something here and that is the reason for my many quiet visits? I don’t know. I
thought that I had finally escaped this place and yet I keep finding myself
here. Nothing makes much sense to me nowadays. I try and focus on studying, but
I’m distracted. What distracts me? This place.
Maybe I should just move on and get away from here. Some place far away and
quiet, peaceful even. I can’t stand the
people here, always leering at me and being so rude. What have I done to them?
I have only ever been kind to their kind. But they have never liked me, treated
me with kindness or accepted me in any way. They simply tolerate my being among
them.
Shifting I glance over towards an
old shed, something had moved and as I peered around the edge of the structure
in an attempt to get a better look, a deer darted out from the forest. A doe,
she had been moving quietly in the underbrush and as suddenly as she had come
into view, she was gone. The white of her tail was all that was left to see of
her for but a moment longer. I smile a little, something that I don’t do often enough and let myself wonder at
where she might be off to in such a hurry. -Away from this place- I thought, a
pointed thought that seemed to make itself visible in the wreckage before me. I
gazed down upon the charred bits of debris and fallen stone. Everything looks
black, sickly even and it makes my stomach churn. My head I notice is hurting,
a dull ache that always arises after I’ve been
here too long. It’s the awful smell of the place. Shaking my
head a little I tuck my hair back behind my ears and start heading further
along towards the pathway to the town. -What a waste of an afternoon.- I
thought and carried on. -What could I possibly hope to find here anyway?
Nothing good ever came of this place.
-So leave.-
Another pointed thought, like
someone pinching me and whispering at my ear. Maybe that’s it, maybe I need to just leave. There is no
home for me here, there never really was. I need to get on with my life and
make a place that I can call my own. A home. I will never find it if I stay
here. Sighing deeply I pick up my bag at the edge of the path, making my way
back into town. It’s not long
before I reach the little cottage I’ve been
staying at and I let myself inside. It’s quiet
here, no one is around so I slip up to my room above the kitchen. The house is
still and I shut my door quietly behind me. Listening for a long while, I
decide that indeed no one is home and I move to sit on the bed. Closing my
eyes, I lay down and curl up on my side. “I’ll leave
tomorrow.” Turning
over I wrap a soft blanket around me, rolling myself up into it tightly. I
whisper it one more time, “I’ll leave
tomorrow.”
~
The Sun has yet to rise this morning
and already I’ve been up for hours, unable to sleep, unable
to focus on anything but the task ahead of me. I’ve written a note to those who
have allowed me to stay here and left a little money for them in thanks. It’s almost
all I have and I don’t have much in the way of belongings either.
They were more necessities, really. My pack feels light and with no food to
fill it, the uncomfortable feeling that slowly begins to creep over me, becomes
almost unbearable. Shifting nervously I head outside into the cool morning air,
my pack slung loosely over my shoulder. My face flushes as I head towards the
marketplace, away from the little cottage. I breathe deeply and evenly, bracing
myself for the scrutiny I will have to face one last time. Hopefully, for the
last time.
The morning light isn’t yet
strong and I find the market to be fairly quiet. The shops were beginning to
open and their owners were busying themselves with their preparations for the
day. I notice there’s a man I had not seen in quite some time at
one of the shops. He was standing quietly with a book in his hands, his nose
buried deep in its pages as he strained to read the words. He looked thoughtful
and so I began making my way towards him. I remember a conversation I had with
him one day when I had been at the Library, he had been kind and suggested a
very curious book to read. I smile softly and approach him, hoping once more
for that same kindness. “Good morning, Sir,” Setting
down my pack I pull a note from my pocket, a list I thought would help me
remember everything I was here to find. The man looked up from his book and a
light flashed in his eyes, or so I thought. His eyes followed me, noticing my
travelling garments and the rather empty pack at my feet. His eyes then fell
then on my bow and quiver that was over shoulder and finally, he met my gaze. I
know he was trying to make some sense of the situation and learn why I had come
so early and not in my usual way either. He had seen me on many occasions I’m sure, but
recently I had not seen him at the market, only in the Library or in one of the
book shops nearby. He calmly closed his book and set it to his side, a gentle
smile working its way across his features.
“Good morning, Miss Layora. How are you doing
today? You are up rather early, aren’t you?” I nodded
and bowed my head a little in acknowledgement, “I am indeed. I would like to buy
some meat and vegetables to take with me.” His smile
widened, “Ah, and where are you going? On a journey,
perhaps?” My cheeks
began to flush a little more, “Yes, I’m leaving. I know that I am no longer
tolerated here and I worry that I will do something to upset the people that
have so kindly taken me in. It is best that I go.” The man nodded slowly and began putting some
meat together for me. He bundled some pork and fish first and I remained quiet
for a few minutes as he did this. Watching him work in quiet, soon he was
holding out two large bundles of wrapped meat for me to take. Shifting a little
uncomfortably, I pulled out what little coin I had left in my pocket and tried
to hand it to him.
.
“There’ll be no charge today, Miss. You will need
all the help you can get if you’re to venture out on your own. This is my
little way of helping. Besides, I know you will be better off out there. You
are a capable young woman and you will fair far better with your own kind, I’m sure of
it.” Shaking
Layora was unable to speak for a moment, she gazed up into the man’s dark
brown eyes and all she saw was kindness. “I’ve never thought poorly of you Miss, not for
your being here either. That was no fault of your own. You’re a lovely
kind of creature, just no one around here seems to think so, but a few.” She bowed
her head and closed her eyes, listening of the truth she always refused to
acknowledge. It was true; it was not her fault for being here. There was no
choice in the matter as she had been brought here when she was very young. “Thank
you-for all your kindness-“ He waved
his hand to her and interrupted, “Never you mind young Miss, you’ll be on
your way soon enough and you’ll be much happier to leave this place
behind.”
Layora met his gaze and smiled once
more, trying to express her thankfulness to the man. He helped her put the meat
away in her bag and motioned for her to be on her way if she expected to meet
with some of the other shops for her vegetables and other necessities. “Thank you,” was all he
allowed her to say once more before he hurried her off further into the market.
~
Standing in the middle of the road
just outside of the town gates, I find myself frozen. Whether it was fear,
nervousness or just plain apprehension, I have no idea. Perhaps it is a mixture
of all three. At this point I didn’t want to understand the feelings for fear of
changing my mind, “I need to leave, this is the only way I will
ever be happy. It’s the only way I will ever even have a chance
at happiness.” Shifting my
weight slightly, I readjust my pack, now full of goods from the market and take
a deep breath. -Time to go. - I thought and headed off along the dirt road away
from the place I refused to call my home.
~
A week has passed since I left the
town and everything had gone just fine. I have managed to save much of my food
and eat balanced meals along the way. I have enough to last me a while and I
can easily hunt more. Being rather skilled with a bow was definitely helpful.
Not many people ever saw me with it in town because I had tried to keep it a
secret to avoid any further scrutiny. I had always been drawn to the archery
range out behind the old home. The sons of the master of the house always
practiced their riding and archery skills out on the house grounds and I would
watch whenever I could. In secret, of course.
Learning to ride, however, proved to
be rather difficult to learn in secret. But over time, it became easier and I
became that much better at hiding my newfound talent. The boys always teased me
about how wonderful it felt to be atop their horses, looking down upon everyone
else and boasting about how well they could ride. But I would simply smile and
tell them that they were right about how wonderful their horses were and soon
the horses were ignoring their owners and following only me about the paddock.
I bathed them in the late afternoon Sun, brushed them in the evening and gave
them treats at night. It was then that they allowed me to ride them. They may
have been the boy’s horses, but they never acted as such. I
smile at the memory of this, the way it felt to be atop those strong animals,
feeling the power that lay hidden beneath their soft coats. Sighing a little I
look out toward my right across the river.
I have been careful to follow it as
it flowed East and fresh water was always to be had whenever I should need it.
It was lovely watching the gentle roll of the current as it moved alongside of
me. I’ve been
collecting any tinder I come across, as well as wild fruits and vegetables for
my stores and I feel far more confident in myself, and in my abilities. I now
know that this journey is possible for me to complete and I will do anything to
see it through to the end. She sighed and looked up at the sky that afternoon,
just enjoying the sounds of the nature around her and the smells of the summer
heat. -I deserve to be happy just as everyone else is, and I know that I will
find happiness. It is just a matter of time before I will find the Elves.-
~
Sitting down in a bit of a huff, I
let my bag slide off my shoulder and rest on the cool grass before the river’s edge. The
Sun is shining beautifully, its reflection mirrored upon the water’s surface
before me. Pulling a book from a pocket in my bag, I open it to a page that has
been marked numerous times. The top corner of the page now withered and folded
down to mark its spot. A map I have long since admired, studied even. It shows
the river I have been following and to the far East, the Mountains stretch out
like a barricade to my freedom. “The Mountains..” I whisper and sigh, closing my eyes for a
moment. Lying back in the grass I realize that I am more than just a little
tired this afternoon. Turning onto my side I open my eyes and gaze off into the
green, back towards the way I came. “I’ll be alright, I’ll make it.
It’s months
away and I’ll be stronger then, much stronger.”
-What if they aren’t there? -
I shudder at the thought and sit up abruptly, “They’ll be
there, don’t think so negatively.” My hand
instinctively reaches up to push a stray piece of hair behind my ear and I
realize how terribly oily it feels. -Time for a wash and although there are no
baths here, the river will do just fine.- I smile and start removing my
clothes, folding them neatly I set them down beside my things. Stretching my feet,
I let my toes wiggle in the grass before I stand and remove my leggings and
undergarments. Pulling out a piece of lavender soap I step quietly towards the
river’s edge and
soon I find myself waist deep in the water. It feels wonderful on my skin and I
revel at the shiver it gives me as I submerge my shoulders beneath its surface.
I spend a little time just swimming about, careful not to go too far from shore
before I start earnestly washing myself.
.
Layora returned to the shallows
after a little while and sitting quietly she wrung her hair free from most of
the water. It glistened in the sunlight, a beautiful ash brown that was slowly
being lightened by the Summer Sun. As she stretched her arms out before her she
turned her palms to the water’s surface and admired them. They were much
darker now. The Sun had coloured her fair skin to a lovely shade of caramel
that she had never seen before. She marveled at the way her hands looked worn
and her skin appeared toughened. Three weeks out in the Sun had changed her,
out in the wilderness, she was beginning to change. She noticed how much her
senses seemed to be developing and she wondered at what else Elves were really
capable of. Never being around them before or finding any books with
substantial knowledge of them, had blinded her to much of their existence. She
craved for knowledge of her people and was so far unsuccessful in learning more
than a few of their ways, their secrets. She didn’t even know if any of it was
really true.
.
Sighing I raise myself from the
water and as I ring my hair out one last time, I step onto the bank and walk
back to my things. Sitting down once more I pull my hair to the left, over my
shoulder and start to braid it. Weary of its length always getting in the way,
I imagine braiding it like this would allow me greater freedom to move. I let
my skin be warmed by the Sun and soon I’m completely dry, though my hair still
remained a little damp. Dressing myself once more I lift my things and continue
on my path. This time I’ve put that book far into my pack, determined
not to think of the Mountains for another few months at least.
.
Later that evening she set up camp
at the edge of the tree line, careful not to stray too far from the river. She
considered it to be her guide and was determined to follow it until it parted
from her path. The river did eventually curve to the South and she would have
to continue to the West, abandoning her surefooted companion. She had started a
small fire and cooked up a beef broth with some of the wild vegetables she had
managed to find along the way. Sitting back on her heels she relaxed by the
fire, the Sun slowly sinking towards the horizon. Sighing, she sipped at the
broth she had poured into her cup and gazed up at the multicoloured sky. The blue
blending into the pink, purple and orange. It was beautiful and she admired the
colours for a long while. Soon her gaze returned to the fire in front of her,
she became lost in it.
.
I listen to the sounds of the forest
so near to me and think of how quiet it really is all the way out here. I haven’t seen any
other beings since I left and truthfully, I hope that I will not have to for a
long while. I set my cup down and rinse it out with a little water before
putting it away. The silence is beginning to weigh on me, “You’ll have to
just get used to it. It’s really not so bad, it’s peaceful
really.” I nod,
agreeing with myself and draw my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around
them I hold myself tightly as I rest my chin on my forearms. My eyes are drawn
back to the fire and I am soon lost in the flames as they flicker back and
forth, licking the night air. Fire. It’s been one of the things that has truly
frightened me and now I must make one almost every day. And yet every time I
set the wood ablaze, my mind races back to the horrible screams of the
villagers and my ‘family’.
Leaving behind the burned buildings has been a great relief and yet, I
somehow feel a great sense of loss. It’s the only home I have ever known. I had been
taken in when I was so young and raised by a family who treated me as if I were
a rat, a pest that was to be tolerated because they could not stand to give me
away. They needed a servant and they thought that I would be better off in
their household if I were to pull my own weight, so to speak. I sigh deeply and
close my eyes, feeling the warmth of the fire’s glow on my cheeks.
I was never going to really be
accepted by them, I was only to be tolerated. My presence only ever stirred up
a commotion in the town and they did their best to shelter me, keeping me
indoors or on the property where I wouldn’t be seen. Never in town, but when the fire
happened, everything was destroyed and everyone had lost so much and I- I had
lost the only family I had ever known. They may not have loved me or were my
real parents, but they fed me, clothed me and gave me a place to live. My real
parents however, I never learned of them. It was never spoken of and I was
never permitted to ask. I only ever remember living with them, never the Elves.
Maybe I never lived with them, maybe I had been given up and left some place
when I was just a baby. Or maybe I am not truly an Elf; maybe I am of mixed
origin and was cast aside because my blood was no longer pure. Maybe, so many
maybes’. I will
never know the answers to these questions and I have long since abandoned the
hope of ever discovering my heritage. All I focus on now is my quest to find
the Great Elves. I want to learn from them, to be among them and be accepted by
them. I can only hope for these things, but without my decision to leave and
find them, I may never have known if any of it was truly possible. But now, now
I can find out and for once, maybe I won’t feel so alone.
.
The night passed by without incident
and with the appearance of the stars, Layora smothered the fire and crawled
into her tent for the night. Eager to sleep and let her dreams wash over her,
she was soon curled up under her blankets and sleeping soundly. By morning she
felt rested and ready to start the day and soon she was up and about, packing
up her little camp site. The fresh smell of the forest and dew covered grass
filled her senses and smiling, she began to think about starting over, “Everything
will work out and turn out for the best. Everything happens for a reason, or so
I’m told.” She
readjusted her pack and started on her way, listening to the sounds of the
river along her side and the occasional bird call as they flew overhead. It was
very quiet and peaceful here and she did enjoy being on her own, at least for the
most part. At night it was always a little unsettling and she sometimes found
it difficult to relax completely. She didn’t mind the noises of the wildlife around her
at night, it was only when they drew too near that she became slightly
unnerved. She had been enjoying her time, reveling in the idea of being
accepted by others and taking her time travelling. The wildlife that surrounded
her never ceased to amaze her, the flowers, the animals and the beauty of the
sky. It all fascinated her. She loved being outdoors and occasionally she would
stop during her travels and pull out her sketchbook to draw something that had
caught her eye. A bird or a rare flower, perhaps.
Most mornings she spent gathering
things for her trip and anything else she thought might help her. She was
always at her most productive then, a trait not many in her previous home had
shared. She had always spent her mornings alone outside by the barns, drawing
or reading before her duties for the morning started. But now she spent that time
preparing herself for her journey and getting on her way as early as possible
was always something she strived to do. By the evenings on most days she felt
somewhat tired and would sometimes stop a little while before the sunset to
start a fire and get her tent settled. So far, the terrain had not been
particularly rugged, but the physical activity was something she was becoming
accustomed to. While she had encountered no real obstacles, she knew that would
eventually change and it would take all of her concentration and strength to
make it.
~
Two months had soon passed by and
she couldn’t have been more pleased with her decision to
finally leave and although her journey would be long, the reward would be well
worth it. She knew that she would change, or rather, that the journey would
change her. Not only physically, but mentally she was beginning to see it in
herself. She was more observant of her surroundings and took the time to
practice her skills as an archer. She had learned to skin her animals and saved
their pelts whenever she could. She was learning, improving every day, even her
sight had never been put to such good use before and she absolutely loved to
see just how far she was capable of actually seeing. Her hearing seemed to have
improved as well, before in the town it was always so loud and although she
could hear quite well, she felt stifled and overwhelmed by all of the noises
that were constantly bombarding her. But now, now she had the opportunity to
hone her hearing ability and discern unique sounds and gage just how far away
they actually were. She loved being out in the wilderness, learning more and
more about herself and what she might be capable of. It pleased her to see the
progress she was making and she knew that it would not all be for nothing.
Layora had started to think about
the winter months ahead and she began toying with the notion of finding a
permanent place to wait out the winter. The more she thought about being shut
in all alone, the faster she threw out the idea. She did plan on stopping or at
least slowing down for a few days to prepare for the months ahead. She would
have to make new boots and a coat, some mittens and other things to keep her
warm. All of this would require time and hard work to put together. She had
already done some of the work by keeping the pelts from the animals she had
caught and knew that she would have more than enough to keep her warm.
Gathering food was always an ongoing task and although she did enjoy hunting,
fruits and nuts made up much of her diet. During the cold season, she knew that
she would be eating much more meat to keep up her strength, so fruit was
something she focused on for the time being. There may be a lot of preparations
ahead, but she was beginning to feel more and more confident in herself and in
her ability to accomplish anything if it meant that she could be happy for the
rest of her life.
~
The next few weeks had gone by
quickly and upon waking on this particular morning, Layora felt the chill of
the morning air wash over her. She shivered and decided that it would be a good
idea to start some of the her preparations. That morning she spent fashioning a
new pair of boots for herself. She had previously made the soles one night and
the remaining task of stitching and lacing the pelts together was an easy one.
She knew it would still be a month or so before the weather turned too cold,
but the seasons were changing and her boots had become virtually unwearable so
she thought that this was a good opportunity to set about making them. By late
morning she was wearing her new boots and was so pleased with how light she had
managed to make them and yet how warm they would actually keep her. Packing up
the rest of her things she started on her way again, hoping to get at least a
few hours of travelling in for the day.
She glanced down occasionally at her
handiwork and smiled warmly to herself. She did have to readjust the strings
now and again as she began to work them in, but she didn’t mind
stopping to lace them tighter. A little preoccupied with her work, she stopped
by the edge of the riverbank to tie them once more. Sitting down she brought
her knee up to her chest and pulled the laces tight, one at a time, before
tying them into a double bow. Her hair slipped over her shoulder, the heavy
braid blocking her view a little. She pushed it from her face and leaning back
on her hands once she was done, gazed out across the river to the bank on the
other side. It was calm today, the river moving quickly and quietly. She
relaxed a bit more and enjoyed the quietness of the late morning. She tried not
to worry about the months ahead that she would eventually have to face and
wondered how they might treat her. She always felt lonely, even before she had
left her home, how would she feel while all alone during a snow storm? She
tried not to concern herself with it just now and decided she would cross that
bridge when she came upon it. Shifting a little she went to stand, but a noise
to her right stilled her movements. It was quiet, barely audible and what
sounded like a low whimper. Sitting still for a long moment she listened
intently for it again.
There it was; another whimper and
this time she heard it very clearly. Rising, she hopped down from the ledge of
the bank onto the soft gravel of the river’s edge. She had left her pack where she had
been sitting and carefully crept along close to the bank’s edge. The
whimper came again and she quickened her pace. Concerned for the animal, she
though that it may be injured and soon she came upon a small opening in the
side of the bank. Stepping in front of it warily, she considered her options.
Watching and listening closely at the opening, the whimper came again. Would it
be wise to stick her head or even a hand inside? Probably not, but the thought
escaped her mind when she heard that feeble whimper once more. She crawled
inside, waiting for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. The earth was soft and
damp beneath her fingertips and as she stared into the darkness she listened
intently. She heard no heavy breathing, only the sounds of an animal struggling
to breathe. Taking a moment, she stared into the den in silence. The slight
whimper came again and she was sure that nothing inside was about to harm her.
Crawling in a little deeper, she could finally make out shapes in the darkness.
They were unmoving and all at once the smell hit her, it was foul, the smell of
decaying flesh had filled her nose and she tried to stop herself from gagging.
Shivering, the dampness slowly crept upon her and blinking hard, she forced
herself to continue. The shapes remained unmoving and soon she realized what
they were.
Wolves. Four small pups lay against
their mother; all were still except for one. All fear left her and she reached
out to touch the little bundles. They were so thin and she grimaced as she
wrapped her arms around them and lifted them to her chest. They felt cold and
frail and it wasn’t until she carried them out of the den that
she saw the source of those sad whimpers. White wolves, they had clung to their
mother when she had passed and now only one of her pups had managed to survive.
Layora gazed down at the bundle of muddied white fur and as she stared,
furrowed her brow deeper. She felt so much sadness and it washed over her all
at once. Trembling, she looked upon them, her eyes began to water. The mother
wolf had died because of a terrible wound that had no doubt become infected.
Her pups too, had perished from malnutrition thereafter.
The one surviving wolf was barely
clinging to life and as she laid the other pups and mum down in the grass up on
the edge of the embankment, she watched the little pup closely. He was
breathing slowly, shallowly and she carefully lifted him and cradled him to her
chest. She walked back to her pack and removed a small rabbit fur, gently
wrapping him in it. Sitting down by the water’s edge, she then tried to get him
to drink. He eventually did drink, but she didn’t let him have too much, just in
case he was ill. She spent some time cleaning him, clearing his face from the
mud that coated his lovely fur. His eyes were tightly shut and she wasn’t sure if
he would be able to open them at all. The crust that had formed around them was
dark and smelt terrible and she did her best to soften it and remove what she
could. His whimpers had ceased and his breathing was slowly becoming more
stable, but she wasn’t sure if he could be brought back to good
health so easily. How long he had been left alone, she did not know and it
pained her to think that he may suffer the same fate as his brothers and
sister. She wondered as well, why these pups had been born so young so close to
the winter ahead. Her eyes glanced back at the mother and her other pups and
she blinked hard to get the tears to stop.
She held him for quite some time and
when he would take nothing more to drink, she wrapped him back in the fur and
placed him by her bag. Looking rather unsettled, Layora went back to where the
other pups and their mother lay. Her heart ached at the sight of them. The
mother had been gravely injured by some other animal and all of the little pups
were so emaciated. She frowned and quietly lifted them one by one up the small
embankment. She laid them down at the base of a nearby tree. Kneeling down next
to the animals, tears fell from her cheeks as she laid the last pup next to its
mother.
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